Wednesday, January 14, 2009
I am hurting today.
Sometimes I think I am ready to go back to my Babycenter birth group and check in on everyone, as I did today. But it just hurts so bad. Everyone is starting to find out the gender of their babies (they're at the 17 week mark now), and I just want to be there so much. I should have my big ultrasound next week, January 20. I should have a belly that I can show off at work. I should have a BABY. But my belly and arms are empty, and that is so hard. I just want to try again now, to cover up these feelings and let myself be happy again. Why don't I get the happy ending that most everyone else does? Why did this happen to me? I want my sweet Max back.
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4 comments:
I'm so sorry. It was very brave of you to face that group. I'm sure I could not have done it.
Abbie... I agree with Megan! Wow girl I wouldn't of been able to face that group! I know that feeling all too well and I still feel it after 9 months of losing Nehemiah. Your in my prayers! Keep praying for peace and His comfort!
My thoughts and prayers are with you as you struggle.. A friend announced last week that she's due the SAME day that we were to be due. I struggled to be happy for them (of course I am) while not showing the intense pain tnat it brought out. There are better days ahead in your struggle, and I'll pray that God gets you there in his time.
I relate to what you're saying so much. I miscarried my baby early this week, and it just hurts so much. I hope you recover soon and the pain of losing the baby starts to recede soon.
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