Wednesday, December 17, 2008

For Mothers Only

This is a poem that my grandmother wrote out for my mother, for her first miscarriage, my sister Ashley, and my mom passed it on to me. What a sad, but powerful tradition.

Here is the text of the poem (which I have changed to be for a boy):

There is a very wee boy, who won't grow up at all.
Did your angel bear him gently, God, because he was so small?
I wondered that you bothered, its such a long, long way
From heaven to a Mother's heart, and not to let him stay.
A lifetime is so little, when it's only for a day.

Excuse the tears and pleading and bitterness I've shown,
I really did not understand that he was just a loan.
I forgot in all the sweetness and joy from day to day,
The little clothes preparing while he was on his way.
Somehow I never really thought he'd have so short a stay.

What sort of baby is he, God? I'm sure he is very good,
But if he cries, perhaps it's just the little blueish hood.
We dressed him pretty warmly to go so far away.
And I knew where he was going, he'd be longer than a day.

So, God, if you're not busy from the cares we give down here,
Will you please take just a minute to whisper in his ear
That I love him very dearly, that I'm glad he came my way,
That I close my eyes and see him.... Ah, God, just say
That I'm glad I was his mother, though it was just for a day.


Mochamama said...

I'm praying for you. I remember all to well what it is like to look a precious baby and my heart goes out to you. I remember feeling so many different feeling after the loss of our baby and honestly there weren't any words that anyone said that made me feel better. And that is ok. Everyone handles loss different, but for me I was down on my knees daily spending time with God and often bawling my eyes out. And it was during that time that he gave me a strength that was not my own to get through it. Sorry for rambling. Praying for you!

Melanie said...

How beautiful... Isn't it amazing how we are truly not alone... We aren't alone because we have Him by ourside and he also has given us family and friends that have gone thru it too! See my mother had trouble getting pregnant too and after 6 yrs she had my sister then 2 years later she had me! Doctors would tell her she couldn't have children! Boy were they wrong... God is good all the time and His love endures FOREVER!!! I agree with the poster above me "Mochamama" to be on our knees daily with Him. It's hard at first but He is the ONE and ONLY we can depend on thru this time. God bless you and you are still in my prayers!

Unknown said...

I'm not sure if you still check this blog or have this email but.... On Monday I had the ultrasound where the doctor looked and looked frantically. Tuesday radiology did an ultrasound and found my baby stopped at 7 weeks 5 days. I was supposed to be 11 weeks 1 day. Now I'm currently having a cytotec miscarriage just like you. This poem is so beautiful and I'm so glad I found your blog, it's everything I have been feeling and blogging myself. Thank you for sharing your process with this miscarriage, it is helping me so much.