Monday, February 23, 2009

Hope for the Weary

It is amazing to me that there are women all over the world, in the US, Canada, Italy, Israel, Pakistan, and the United Arab Emirates (and that is just the list from my visitors yesterday), who are so different in so many ways, but just alike in one very heartbreaking way: we have lost a baby. And for some of us, as if that was not heartbreaking enough, we had to take a medicine or have a surgery to get rid of our babies. They didn't just leave us, we had to force them out. Looking back, I'm not sure how I ever let them talk me into getting rid of my baby.

I always planned this blog to be for me, for my children, and my friends and family. But then there was a change in plans, and now I think it's more than that. I think that my blog is for all of you women who are miscarrying now or will ever miscarry. So that you can know that there is hope and a future after losing your baby. Because there is.

You will cry. I know that two months later I am still crying, maybe a little less often than then, but still a lot. I'm sure I have many, many more tears to cry. You will feel deep loss. You will feel the pain of a broken heart. You will despair and you will not know if life is worth this much pain.

But, you will also love. You will have compassion and empathy for others. You will feel more deeply than you did before. You will see the world in a different way. And you too will hope.

May God grant you peace in your time of suffering.


Shaina N said...

I really appreciate this post! I managed to have a natural miscarriage, but I know that it was still horribly difficult and heart breaking, and not for the faint of heart or stomach.

You do still cry, but your heart grows so insurmountably bigger that you can't hold in all the love, tears, and sorrow you feel for other people in your position. You just want to wrap your arms around them and rock them, and cry.

I appreciate this post a lot!

Alison said...

Hi! I found your blog through Bring the Rain...

I had a miscarriage in 2007 that shocked me. I never thought it would happen to me. It was my second pregnancy (we have a 4 yr old daughter). Five months later we conceived our son and he will be a year in May. We named him Broderick (Brody) Samuel (because of the story of Hannah in the Bible).

I have said a prayer for you, that God will bless you.

Thanks for your honesty!


Melanie said...

Ooooo girl this is a great post! It's so sad to know that so many families are hurting around the world and yet so many will indeed go thru the same path we have and God has given us this "season" to help others along the way!

We even have testimony between me and you and many others.

There are so many emotions that one feels but I can say almost a year since mine and I am stronger than ever and I give Him all the Glory....

Sweet friend I am praying for you and by the way love the new blog pic of u :)

joy! said...

Oh, Abbie, I'm so sorry for your pain. I just came across your blog tonight and wanted you to know that there really is hope. I encourage you to allow yourself to grieve, and to take your grief to the Cross. Ask Him to give you a word from His Word -- a word just for you. A word that will carry you in the darkest times.

I, too, am in the sisterhood of miscarriages (and thermometers). My fifth and last was 20 years ago, when I lost twins at 16 weeks. I assure you that you'll always remember, but the pain will fade if you allow His healing presence.

In reading through some of your earlier posts, I encourage you to ask Him to point you to a new task, a new interest. Not to miminize or ignore your loss, but to fully embrace every day. A burst of creativity that will carry over 'til your move in June and beyond.

Finally, today we had the joy of celebrating our son's 10th birthday. Thanks be to God for a woman in Nepal who birthed him and for orphanage workers who kept him until we could bring him home to join his sister born in China. What grace. What joy!