Four.

Olivia would have been four today. It is so hard to imagine having a four year old girl, especially with three little boys running around the house. I bet she would have been my sweet little helper. Mommy misses you, but I'm so happy that you are with Jesus now. Happy birthday!

 "It's such a cruel thing to lose a baby. Nothing is ever untainted again... not even hope."
-Lady Agnes, Upstairs Downstairs.

You have reached an answering machine... BEEP!

Hello! You have reached my former blog. While I am so glad that you are here to share in your journey, especially if your journey involves taking cytotec for a miscarriage, I am no longer sharing my children's stories with the general public, for safety concerns. If I know you from blog-land or real life, leave a comment with your e-mail address (or e-mail it to me with the link in the upper right corner of this page) and I can add you to the list of viewers of my new blog. If you are in need of prayer or someone to talk to, feel free to leave a comment, as well, and I will be notified via e-mail. God bless!

Tomorrow!!!

The news of the weekend is.... babies tomorrow! They are going to induce me at 8 am because my blood pressure has been creeping up and I will be full term (for twins, they bake a little faster :-P).

HOORAY!!!!!!!!! We are so excited and it was WONDERFUL to have an entire weekend to finish the last minute details, rather than going into labor unexpectedly and having to come home to laundry or a dirty house or no food in the fridge.

We won't have internet access at the hospital because our laptop is broken and away at Dell currently, so all you blogger folks will just have to wait for the announcement until we get back home! If you're my (or Jonathan's) friend on facebook, you'll probably get to see some pictures there a little bit sooner, if Jonathan is able to sneak home briefly and upload some.

Thank you for your prayers!

35 weeks: Check!

Well, we reached 35 weeks! Wahoo! I have to go in for preeclampsia bloodwork today, so you could be praying that I don't have that... or that it's not a huge problem before I deliver and doesn't affect these last however many days of the babies' growth. I have a growth ultrasound, as well as BPP+NST on Wednesday morning and then my weekly OB appt. on Wednesday afternoon. I had a dream last night that when they checked my cervix at that appointment, I was already at 7 cm. But I'm pretty sure that's just wishful thinking. :-P

7 more days to full term. When next Monday rolls around I am done laying down all day - I'm pulling out the Just Dance II (Wii game) and climbing the stairs. (Actually, my aching knees will prevent both of those things, I'm sure, but the point is I will be doing everything to get these babies out.) But we'll see if we even make it that far!

Jonathan awesomely finished all of my baby laundry this weekend and got our pack-n-play set up in our room and I feel like we are just about ready to go to the hospital! We just need to finish packing our hospital bags. Well, the babies' bag is ready, so they won't be needing for anything, but my and Jonathan's bags are only partially done - we could survive with what I've got in them, but it'd be nice for him to have snacks and reading material and I need to get our baby books in them, etc.

Thanks for your prayers - I can't believe we are days (21 or less!) away from holding our little boys!

34w, 4d: Babies soon?

For those of you non-facebook users (ahem, Bill and Jen!), I just wanted to update you with the latest news.

Yesterday I was feeling a lot of pressure on my cervix all day from Baby A's head... It seemed like he was trying to ram his way out of there! I had an appointment at 3:45, so I went in and of course it was an eventful appointment... They found protein in my urine (they tested on two different samples to make sure), which is one sign of preeclampsia (which I am doubly more at risk for because of the twins and gestational diabetes), and seeing as how my blood pressure has been getting fairly high around 130/75 (which is pretty high for me! I started at 90/60), I now have to do a 24-hour urine collection and some blood tests on Monday to see if I really have it or not. The worst that would probably happen with that is that they would induce earlier than originally planned because they want to avoid me having a stroke... But you gotta love racking up the "high risk pregnancy" factors. :-P

Then there was the other news... I am dilating! I went from closed two weeks ago to 1.5 cm dilated, 60% effaced and Baby A at -2 station (so he is starting to sink into my pelvis). Because of all of the pressure I am feeling, which is normal at this point for twins, I am now on bedrest, although she didn't actually use the word "bedrest." Basically, she told me our goal now is to make it to Monday, which is 35 weeks, and that reclining in bed will hopefully keep the dilation at bay. My goal is to make it to my brother Matthew's birthday, which is Wednesday, March 2 - 35w, 2d. We have a growth ultrasound that morning and it would be nice to be armed with weights of the babies, so that I can have a valid argument for a breech extraction of B - he was more than 1/2 lb. smaller than A last time and the gap is probably even a little wider now (just from their growth patterns, not because he isn't getting enough nutrients or anything). If I make it to Wednesday, then the next goal is full term on Monday, March 7!

I did have a bit of a labor scare this morning - contractions every 8 minutes for an hour, and then they slowed to every 15 minutes and then stopped. I called the doctor to make sure this was okay, and apparently we are no longer worried about stopping pre-term labor, so I'm not supposed to call the doctor back until I've had 6 contractions in an hour and things are getting closer together.... So WOW - I guess if I actually go into labor at this point, we will be meeting babies soon thereafter!

We have a few more odds and ends to do, mostly laundering blankets and sheets that we were waiting to do until after the vent cleaning that finally got done yesterday. I was hyperventilating a little bit this morning thinking that they weren't going to have clean blankets to bring them home in! But Jonathan will do those tonight or tomorrow and then we will be ready (at least materially, maybe not emotionally hehe)... eek!

We are so excited to meet our babies. Thank you for your prayers!

33 weeks: Happy birthday to me and three weeks to full term!

Happy birthday to me! Glad that my boys held out this long, and hoping they don't come for a few more weeks, although it would be fun to share a birthday.

We had a couple great appointments last week... The boys passed their first NST/BPP (now weekly because of the Gestational Diabetes), they are both head down now(!), and they are chunkers, both over 4 lbs. already! Baby A is 85th percentile, and weighed 4 lbs., 13 oz.; Baby B is 50th percentile at 4 lbs., 3 oz. Wow, those are good sized babies already!

I will be full term in three weeks and while I am wanting to get to that point, I hope they won't stay in much longer than that!
- I have developed PUPP (an itchy pregnancy rash) over the past week and so far nothing is working for relief! My birthday present to myself is calling my doctor today for a stronger, prescription remedy. The rash started on my belly, but is now on my wrists and will probably spread up my arms and down my legs, as well (according to the books). Oh the things we have to live with for our kids' sake. :-P It's kind of sad to be missing out on my last few weeks of good sleep because of a stupid rash!
- Also, my ankles have disappeared over the past two days... and I kind of liked my ankles. I woke up this morning with puffy eyes from lack of sleep and puffy lips (who knows why!) and I looked pretty awesome, not gonna lie.
- My knees are groaning under the 50 lb. weight gain that they have endured so far and I am ready to lose this weight and be normal sized again (I'd even take 25 lbs. less, that would be fine with me)! Gotta love the twin breastfeeding diet.
- Also, not going to lie, being able to freely eat chocolate and cupcakes and all means of sugar again means that I will probably be binging on those things for the first few days after birth.

We got the boys' dresser in this weekend, so I am ready to finish the last few items on our to-do list before they are born! I am going to start baby laundry (clothes and cloth diapers) today and hopefully the folks who are coming to clean our vents will come today or tomorrow so that I can wash the babies' sheets and get their beds ready, too! So excited to have things all set up for them... I can't believe how close it is now!

I love you babies so much and can't wait to see you soon!!! But not too soon. Three more weeks and then you can come at your leisure. LOVE YOU BOYS!

30w, 4d: Head down and ready to go!

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday with my Ob/Gyn. Everything looked great, including Baby A who is now HEAD DOWN!!! Wahoo! In the state of Maryland for a first time mother, Baby A has to be head down to attempt a natural delivery. There are only unlicensed midwives that would try a breech twin birth in a first time mom and they are probably unlicensed for that reason! Baby B can be whatever he pleases because they will try to turn him either during A's delivery or after it - the second baby frequently turns on his own during this time anyway, so having him head down is helpful, but not required. I did feel Baby B attempting to turn last night (wow, that is uncomfortable from how big he is now!), but I don't think he got there in the end - good try, baby! The other good news is that Baby A's head seemed to have dropped into my hips a bit, so hopefully he will stay put.

Also, I'm not dilated at all yet, so we're still good on the no bedrest front! That is a huge praise, since I have been expecting bedrest for a long time now. :)

I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes last week after failing my test, but the diet/finger pricking has not been bad at all, and I actually feel a lot more energetic and less moody, now that my blood sugars are fairly stable. Since I am controlling it well with diet at this point, no insulin shots needed!

We have our two cribs set up and two mattresses in them, and are currently looking for a dresser to purchase. I am really hoping to get one this weekend, so that I can start washing clothes and putting them away. Our room is full of gift bags of baby clothes (sorted by size), so it will be nice to have it less cluttered again. Also, I need to know what I still need so that I can ask for hand-me-downs and buy what I am not given.

I had my church shower this past weekend and we were truly "showered" with gifts! So many people have been praying for us to, first, get pregnant, and then for these two babies specifically, and I think they were a little bit excited to buy things for them! We received so many cute outfits, my twin nursing pillow, my breast pump and supplies, a personalized, handmade nursing cover, a bathtub, and so much more! I was just amazed at how generous everyone was and so thankful. And I've already almost finished my thank you's from that shower!

I am getting so excited for these babies to come into the world. Now that we are getting to a point where they would be fairly healthy if born (although they would still require a bit of a NICU stay at this point) I feel much more relaxed and can just enjoy these last few weeks of babes-in-womb.

Thank you all for your prayers! As I have been saying in my thank you cards this week, God has been abundantly faithful to us!

28w, 3d: At least one of the babies is photogenic...

We had our next growth ultrasound today... Baby A was measuring 3 lb., 0 oz. (80th percentile, with a big noggin!) and Baby B was measuring 2 lb, 12 oz. (55th percentile). Baby A flipped back to breech and Baby B is still transverse (he likes floating above his brother where he never gets squished :-P), so we're still looking at a c-section, unless Baby A chooses to flip again and stay head down! Baby A was being absolutely camera shy, so we got literally zero shots of him. (I'm going to blame it on the fact that he stayed up ALL NIGHT LONG and thus slept during his photo shoot.) We did, however, get some AMAZING shots of Baby B:





What a cutie! I love how chubby his cheeks are getting. :) Wish I could say the same for his brother!!! Maybe next time...

28 weeks: no names yet, 3 lb. babies?

28 weeks! The babies should be right around 3 lbs. now if they have been on track with their 6 oz./week over the past few weeks - we will see what they weigh on Thursday at our next growth ultrasound!

I had one episode of scary contractions (getting closer together, stronger, 6 in 1.5 hours!) on the plane ride home from Louisiana. Thank the Lord that the contractions ended and we didn't have to go to the hospital in Pittsburgh immediately upon arriving. (Or ever. I would not have wanted to be stuck in a hospital in Pittsburgh without my Jonny in town!)

I really am starting to feel the heaviness of these two babes - possibly it has something to do with them gaining 3/4 lb. together each week. They are gaining so rapidly and I am feeling it! I have reached the 40 lb. mark now (up to 129), which is great, but I am happy to know that a lot of these extra pounds will be gone in a few months - I do not sleep well, move well, etc., at this weight.

We purchased our cribs this week - I found them $70 off at just the perfect time! Now if only our dresser would go on sale like that. ;)


This week I have to get my Rhogam shot and take my second three hour glucose test. Sigh. Hopefully I will pass again! At least this time Jonny will be there to drive me home!

We haven't decided on that second name yet. It's down to about three or four choices that we have been throwing around for a while... But hopefully we will be able to decide soon!

Our next goal (according to my doctor) is 32 weeks. I think I can, I think I can...

A new look for the new year!

Happy new year! We are super excited to be just two months away from holding our babies!

26 weeks: Bigger than Ever

Well, we've hit 26 weeks today and I'm still feeling good! Yesterday I reached a new milestone with my first day of swollen ankles - I think I did a little too much walking around/standing, so I'll be trying to stay off my feet mostly for the rest of vacation. My hands are also starting to swell ever so slightly. Let's keep praying for no preeclampsia!

I felt "for sure" hiccups in each of the babies at separate times yesterday, which was fun. :)

I'm still not having too many contractions in a day, although I definitely get more when I walk around or do too much. But praise the Lord for no pre-term labor episodes yet - I'd love to keep off of bedrest for as long as possible!

Still no decision about names... although Jonathan and I do need to have a conversation about them while we are on break and he is rested and has time to do whatever he wants, rather than having to come home and cook for me and do chores after a long day of work!

We are so in love with these sweet boys and can't wait to meet them... in 9+ weeks' time (hopefully)!

24 weeks: These babies could live outside of me! (Scary thought.)

I absolutely don't want my babies coming out for at least another 11 weeks, but I am so thankful for hitting the 24 week mark yesterday - my sweet babies could live outside of me!

Next goal: 3 lb. babies (about 27-28 weeks)!

Names
We are pretty sure on one name and trying to toss around a few options for the second name in our heads. The problem is that Name #1 has a shorter version (nickname) that we will probably always call that baby by, and we want Name #2 to have the same thing... But we can't agree on any nicknames that we both love! Not sharing the names yet, but here's an example: if we were going to name Baby #1 Nicholas, and always call him Nick, I feel like we can't name the other one Carter unless we were to always call him Cart (not just in passing), which is unacceptable to me. (Like the BSB reference there? Heh.) I'm not going to sign a card "Love, Jonathan, Abbie, Nick and Cart." So that is my conundrum. Is this not a problem? If you think I am being crazy and it would be fine to have a Nicholas who we always called Nick and a Carter who we always called Carter, please feel free to let me know in the comments. I guess I would feel like this was not a big deal for siblings, but with twins, I feel like their names should at least sort of go together (even though we are not rhyming them or starting with the same letter).

Weight gain
31 lbs. down, 19+ to go! I have finally caught up with the chart from Dr. Luke's book for recommended weight gain for underweight twin moms. And I am right on schedule, since she likes to see a majority of weight gained toward the front end of pregnancy (I think she said by 24 weeks). Go me!

Pre-Term Labor
Well, I have finally hit a point where I absolutely cannot push myself too far. If I am dehydrated at all (and we're talking less than 8-sixteen ounce glasses of water every day!), haven't eaten enough, go up the stairs too quickly or too frequently, do too much during the course of a day, etc., I get a contraction. Up until this point, God has been gracious to me in my slow learning and I haven't actually had more than one an hour (four an hour for two hours straight is considered pre-term labor). They usually frighten me enough to get me to down a huge glass of water and lay down. At least I know what they feel like now (because before I was worried that I wouldn't recognize a contraction when it came) and can watch for them. But my goal is to not have any triggered contractions (of course pregnant women will always get Braxton Hicks ones that you just can't prevent, but these also shouldn't trigger PTL) over the next week (and, of course, until I'm full term - but I'm taking it one week at a time here). This week is particularly rough for me because we are MOVING and I want to DO things. But although yesterday was quite productive, yesterday night proved that I did WAAAAY too much. So I'm off my feet today and I will be glued to the couch the rest of this week!

Gestational Diabetes
I passed my Glucose Tolerance Test - woohoo! Sadly, they are going to make me retake it around 28-30 weeks, since apparently the results can change.

Car
Fixed! Our friend gave us the name of his mechanic who fixed our $400 problem for only $60. HOORAY!

Olivia's first birthday

Happy first birthday to my precious Livie! She would have been one today.

I am thankful for my sweet girl in heaven who is praising Jesus right now. But I really wish I could have seen her first steps and if she liked chocolate cake as much as her mommy.

It hurts to know that we should be partying it up with a one year old, but I am so thankful for the two precious boys kicking in my womb right now. Lord, please preserve their lives!

22 weeks: all is well!

Well, I guess I go on record as worst mommy blogger ever. :) Our lives are just so busy right now, though!

What's going on lately:
-Jonathan's name list was at 295 names the other day and has been cut down to 211 thus far. We're making some good progess, folks.
-I have been doing a great job of gaining weight (except this week; I was 114 on Monday and dropped to 113 by today... I guess those 2 cups of ice cream every night really were helping!)
-My new doctor is AMAZING. So lovely. She asked me if anyone had spoken to me about vaginal birth and told me as long as Baby A is head down and not too much smaller than Baby B, we're good to go. She is not repeating ultrasounds on days that I have just had one at the peri's office, which is nice and saves my babes from some radiation exposure, and sits down at a table with me to have conversations, where I am treated like an adult. She actually cares about the things I say - like when I told her I am having some back and hip pain, she gave me a referral to a physical therapist (who healed my hip pain the first day and is going to work with me on my back).
-I just barely failed the one hour glucose test and have to go back for the three hour one on Friday. I am pretty sure I will pass it.
-And on a funny and totally unrelated note, we ran over something on the way home from Thanksgiving break and broke off a plastic bracket that was tying a plate on the bottom of the car to the frame. It is making an awful racket, but seemed to be driving without a problem. When I brought it to the Toyota dealership to have them check it out, they wanted to charge us $400 (four! hundred! dollars!) to fix it... but get this: it is just an annoying noise, nothing is actually going to fall off or break further. So yeah, we're living with a very loud car. If you hear that deafening rattling sound, it's probably just the Burnhams driving to church. :-P

From our 20 week ultrasound:

Sweet baby tootsies!

Cutest lips and nose!

18w, 0d: Boys! (and food questions)

Who thought that I would be carrying twin boys in my womb? I certainly did not think so. I am almost halfway done! (And really, about halfway to full term with twins!)

My constant companion through this pregnancy is worry over my wee ones being too little when they are born. I am so little to be carrying twins and I did not have extra body fat anywhere on me before I was pregnant for them to eat off of later when I can't fit enough into my stomach. My doctors (who are useless and talk down to me and are being fired this week!) are on the opposite end of the scale from my worry and don't even comment on my weight gain ever. I asked for a recommendation of a dietician and they scoffed at me. "Just eat a lot. Around 3000 calories a day." But I don't know how one does that when one is trying not to make all her calories empty ones!

Any recommendations for meals that can be made in bulk and reheated throughout the week, are high in calories, protein, and preferably vitamins/minerals? Currently I have Jonathan make a large batch of chili once a week and that becomes at least one meal every day. I already drink about four glasses of whole milk every day. Ensure is too heavy for my stomach and makes me either 1) throw up or 2) not hungry for the next few hours, so it is not worth the 350 calories. I don't eat nuts, so that is out, and I'm not huge on cheese, but I will eat it if there are other tastes mixed in (such as in quesadillas or tacos). Any ideas?

16w, 3d: Can you guess the genders?

Baby A

Baby B

For full disclosure, we had a guess of two boys at 12 weeks (but they can often be wrong on those earlier ultrasounds). Now we are at 16 weeks and we are sure this time!

13w, 5d: Never had a baby this big before!

I'm alive and so are the babes-in-womb. Being pregnant with twins is a lot of work - not complaining, just making an excuse for not updating. :)

My little darlings at 12w, 2d:

Prayers Needed

Please pray for my dear friend, Kiley, who found out yesterday that her baby, Levi, passed away in her womb. She lost a daughter, Avery, in February, so this is a compounded loss, so soon after the first.

Thanks,

9w, 3d and the munchkins are great!

I had my first appointment at my actual Ob/Gyn's office today! I am seeing a midwife, but she is extremely knowledgeable and kind. They surprised me with an ultrasound today, which was a wonderful surprise. Sadly, Jonathan wasn't there because I was sure that they weren't going to do one! Apparently, since twins' heartbeats are hard to tell apart on Doppler, I will get an ultrasound at every appointment I have.

Our babies are both growing perfectly and are both measuring a couple days ahead of schedule now. One of the babies was perfectly facing the ultrasound probe and the other was a bit reluctant to have his/her photo taken, but we got great shots of both.





It was so sweet to see them wiggling around and to hear some very strong heartbeats. Thank you for your prayers! How good is God for giving us these sweet babies?

New look!

It's about time, huh?